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3 things to do when nothing seems to work

There are times in our lives when things just seem to come to a standstill or even worse - go backward, when it appears that all the plans we have made fall apart, and everything we worked hard for does not pay off. We plan things out, we take all the right steps, yet the path seems to be blocked – people back out, technology breaks, weather interferes, relationships end, jobs spit us out, and so on.

During these times, we tend to cry out, “Why me?” or “What did I do wrong?” At such times we stop expanding and begin to contract, feeling perhaps anxious, fearful, and depressed. In an attempt to make sense of our apparent failure in life, we may look for people or circumstances to blame and may feel anger and frustration at life in general. If you have ever experienced such a period in your life, then you know how frightening and painful it may be.


Photo by S Migaj: https://www.pexels.com/photo/a-person-sitting-on-wooden-planks-across-the-lake-scenery-747964/


So why does this happen and how do we get through it?


The first step is to take a breath. Literally… take a conscious breath to pull yourself out of the anxiety in your head and into the present moment. At that very moment is the Earth still in its orbit? Is the sun still shining on it? Do you still have clothes to wear and food to eat? Then you are all right. It is a pause, not a crisis.


Once you get your own attention, the next step is to adjust your perception. What if what seems like a very negative period in your life is actually a blessing? What if it is on purpose? What if the intention is to help you get to something much bigger than you could have reached if you kept going the way you did? How would you view this time if you knew it was a deliberate, benevolent development? Would you fight it or would you go with the flow, feeling more relaxed? The time when everything stops and seemingly breaks down is often given to us as a space for reflection, re-assessment, and decision-making for course correction. It is provided so that we could shift in a more effective direction. COVID 19, for example, has done exactly that for the whole planet.


The third step is relaxing into this pause and taking the time to reflect. When we are locked in fear and anxiety, it is difficult to allow creativity and intuition to flow through us. However, when we expand instead of contracting, we can begin to see new potentials and new directions. So while the instinct may be to tighten our grip on life and gain control at any cost, relaxing, letting go, and listening for intuitive guidance may be the best path towards moving forward again. So spending more time alone and in nature might be very conducive to this time of quiet inner work.


When you face a reset pause in your life, find the courage to trust the benevolence of the process and take the time to re-evaluate your path. When the time is right, you will once again find yourself moving forward full steam ahead.

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